Tag: Reality

The Search IS the Meaning of Life

I sit here in a church parking lot on Thursday afternoon watching the traffic light about a block away just wondering about what all these folks are doing.  I would imagine a lot of them are on their way home from work or maybe just taking the time to take a leisurely drive somewhere. It’s 105° out and I’m in the shade but it doesn’t feel so hot to me.  It does give you time to sit, relax and unwind. I love having the time to do this and don’t take it enough. I continue to think about the meaning of life and all the articles that abound about it and the search for it.

I think the whole thing is a little bit out of skew because I think he search IS the meaning of life. Does that sound odd?  I don’t know because for people that are trying to seek their meaning, the reality is, we all are in the middle of a search.

It is interesting to me that we go through each day with new experiences and every minute of the day we rarely take the time to really see what’s going on. Additionally, sometimes we think that only intellectual people or professional people or people that are successful have thoughts about the meaning of life. But I think really what happens is it becomes part of somebody’s nature to wonder about these things and when they start the search begins and then it’s time to fill in the blanks. Showing someone, the blanks is the joy of being alive.

Every single experience we have is part of our meaning to our life. We sometimes think that the meaning of life means we have a specific purpose or meaning that we should find out and pursue. But to me the whole life encounter is a series of experiences that we are built to learn from and where that path leads maybe exactly where we thought it would or maybe it will lead in an entirely different direction.

I spoke earlier about different people and whether they think about the meaning of life or a purpose in life and I was talking about professionals and people that are well-off. But if you look at the other end, you look at homeless people or people that are struggling who sometimes don’t really have the time, in their opinion, to search for other things other than how to just survive. And that search is part of the meaning of life because what they’re looking for is their meaning and that encapsulates everything they’re doing. So, if they’re out trying to find money to buy a bottle of water then that search is part of their meaning to life and whether they’re successful or not may mean they take a particular road or path.

I always used to struggle with trying to determine my purpose and meaning. Ultimately, I realized that everything I experienced forms my reality. It is in those moments that I must choose whether I want to change my reality or not. How about you?

We all have the ability to choose our reality. It is just a matter of whether we consciously make the effort to do what is necessary. What is necessary is looking at every experience through a different looking glass.  Maybe it is time to mix it up and look at things differently.

“Change nothing and nothing changes.” – Tony Robbins

Remember, life is a journey and the experiences you have on that journey will reflect your meaning. The trick is to determine how the journey is going to unfold. Just like going on a trip that has been planned ahead of time, the journey of your life can be planned out also. Understand that it is not something we are used to. We are used to just having things happen and trying to figure out “why.” And when they do, we try to relate him to our reality and then you stand the “why”.

Today you need to really start looking at everything going on around you and especially things that you don’t think are related to you. Because everything that happens in our life has an impact. Be the one that determines your own reality and understand your reality impacts many others.

The Search IS the Meaning of Life.

Discover more insightful articles and explore opportunities to contribute by visiting The Fergusson Group today!

A Practical Guide to Navigating Home Renovations Without Losing Your Mind

Embarking on a home renovation can feel like stepping into a whirlwind of decisions, expenses, and unknowns. Whether you’re adding an extension or simply updating your kitchen, the path to a refreshed space is rarely straightforward. While the end result can absolutely be worth it, the process requires patience, planning, and a willingness to adapt when surprises pop up—as they inevitably will. Understanding the major components involved in a renovation ahead of time can help you stay grounded and better enjoy the journey to a new and improved home.

Renovation Possibilities Beyond the Obvious

Most people associate home renovations with shiny new kitchens and Pinterest-worthy bathrooms, but there’s a much wider range of projects to consider. Basement renovations are a popular choice for families looking to create more usable living space, and home extensions offer room to grow when moving isn’t feasible. Converting a spare room or corner into a home office has also become increasingly important, especially for remote workers. These types of renovations don’t just change how a space looks—they change how you live in it. And each type brings different challenges: kitchens and bathrooms often involve plumbing upgrades, while extensions might require foundation work, structural assessments, and roofing.

Get a Home Warranty for an Added Extra Layer of Security

Once the dust settles and the final walkthrough is done, you might want to think about a home warranty. These plans cover repairs to home systems and appliances, which can bring peace of mind in case a newly installed item breaks down sooner than expected. This is a good option to consider, especially if you can find a policy that includes coverage for removal of defective equipment and failures caused by improper installation or poor workmanship. Not everything is included in traditional homeowner’s insurance, so having that additional protection can offer just the safety net you need.

Timelines Aren’t Fictional, But They’re Flexible

Setting a schedule is essential, but you’ll need to view your timeline as a rough map, not a guarantee. Most renovations take longer than expected due to hidden structural issues, backordered materials, or delays in permitting. You should work with your contractor to establish clear phases—demolition, installation, inspection, etc.—and build in buffers for the unexpected. If your family will be living in the house during the renovation, you’ll want to plan ahead for which areas will be inaccessible and for how long. Having realistic expectations about timing helps reduce frustration and allows you to focus on progress instead of setbacks.

Budgets and the Price of Peace of Mind

One of the trickiest parts of any renovation is cost. Beyond materials and labor, you’ll also need to account for design fees, permits, disposal services, and contingency funds for when things go wrong. A safe rule is to add 15-20% on top of your initial estimate to cover unexpected expenses. Tools like budgeting spreadsheets or apps can help track your expenses in real-time. It’s also a good idea to get itemized quotes from multiple contractors and check whether any part of the renovation could make you eligible for tax credits—especially for energy-efficient upgrades.

Find Contractors Who Do More Than Talk a Good Game

Hiring the right contractor isn’t just about choosing someone with a nice website. Word-of-mouth recommendations from people you trust are often the most reliable. Once you have a few names, check their licenses, verify insurance, and ask for examples of past work. A reputable contractor should be comfortable answering detailed questions about their process and providing a clear contract that outlines responsibilities, timelines, and payment schedules. Don’t be afraid to walk away if something feels off—trust is the foundation of a successful renovation.

Speak Your Vision Without Micromanaging

Even the best contractors can’t read your mind, so clear communication is critical. Use photos, sketches, or online mood boards to illustrate your vision. Be specific about your must-haves versus your nice-to-haves, and don’t assume that silence means understanding—walk through the plans together regularly. That said, try not to hover during every hour of the build. Give your contractor room to do their job while checking in at agreed-upon intervals to review progress and tackle any unexpected questions.

Don’t Skip the Permits

Permits can feel like a bureaucratic headache, but skipping them can cost you dearly later on. Any structural change, electrical update, or plumbing reroute typically requires a permit, and failing to secure one can delay resale or void your homeowner’s insurance. Most contractors will handle permits on your behalf, but you should still verify this in writing and ask to see documentation. Even projects that seem minor, like adding a deck or replacing windows, may require approval depending on your local ordinances.

Home renovations can be a rollercoaster of choices and changes, but when done right, they breathe new life into your space and how you experience it every day. From planning and budgeting to hiring and protecting your family, each stage brings its own challenges—but also its own rewards. The goal isn’t perfection but transformation, guided by smart decisions and a clear sense of what matters most to you. When the final nail is hammered in and the last piece of furniture is set, you’ll know exactly why it was worth every step.

Discover more insightful articles and explore opportunities to contribute by visiting The Fergusson Group today!

Reality in Life

We all struggle with the idea of who we are, where we’re going and why we are here. It is important to understand that the reality of our life is what we make it.  Is it what will happen to us or is it the realization that we can determine where we’re going to go?  Of course, detours may happen along the way, but it is the self-determination that we focus on that guides us to our ultimate purpose.

We can talk about our system of belief, our philosophy of the purpose of life, our origins, our experiences, our upbringing or any of the other factors that may have determined who we are and where we’re going. These are all valid but, in the end, it is our environment today that determines our current reality infused with our attitude, positive or negative, that establishes who we are today and sets the stage for who we will be tomorrow.

If you look at yourself, are you someone who is progressing toward a destination that is satisfying?  Or, do you see yourself not making any progress in your life or slipping backwards? What is it about your reality that needs to change? What is it about your attitude that needs to change?  If you believe in self-determination, you need to figure out what the next step is going to be. If you don’t, you will wait and react to the next thing that happens to you. Is that really what you want to do, wait for something to happen to you?

No matter what your belief system is today, it can be different tomorrow. If you say, “I am so down in the ditch, there is no way my life can be different tomorrow,” you are not understanding how elevating your life can be when measured in the smallest of factors. What is important is the smallest bit of progress, measured by you, not the immediate complete change.  The transition can be instant or barely noticeable.  It is only you who fixates on the outcome.

What is important is change you are creating in your mind; you need to believe that the change is worthwhile and fixate on that notion. To transcend, you need to change your mind.  You need to change your mindset and change your attitude.  No one can do this for you.  Stepping up to face a life change means flipping the switch.  I say this from experience – smoking. For seventeen years I didn’t know what it took to stop. I tried hundreds of times.  Finally it got to the point where I had to flip the switch in my mind! Emphatically determine that I was going to quit smoking. I was not going to fall for the gratification that smoking gave me.  I was going to enjoy other gratifications that came along with not smoking.  All this was a mental process – not a time absorbing process, just an acceptance in the absolute belief that I no longer had to do this activity. It was just a decision that was made that finally clicked in my mind. The decision clicked and my mind’s switch was flipped, and I no longer had the urge to smoke.

All this may seem very easy, but it’s not.  I understand that. My point here is that your reality in life is what you make it. You need to get rid of the negative perceptions of your past and decide on the realities of your future. Let me say that one more time – get rid of the perceptions of your past and dwell on the realities of your future.

Please understand I’m here to help you.  I have an incredible will to help others flip the switch. Email me or call me anytime to help you get to where you want to be.

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Reality Exposed

Whether it be in business or life, we always run into situations that call for a decision. Whether we know it or not, we’re always making this decision based upon our knowledge, our experience, or our awareness around us. That decision is whether to be in the real world or be in a made-up world.

This may sound a little funny but what this is referring to is how we may appear, communicate or interact depending upon the situation. In other words, are we going to be completely truthful in the situation, are we going to be our natural self when we are involved in some way with another individual. Everyday we’re making those decisions. Every conversation means we are taking stock of the situation and responding in some way. Let me give you an example – let’s say you are preparing to ask someone to go to dinner and you perceive the person as an extrovert and you are not quite an extrovert but not a true introvert. In your judgment of the situation means you need to be very gregarious, outgoing and enthusiastic about the asking. Therefore, you are going a bit outside your normal personality. Now this is a very simple situation, but it does reflect how we tweak our realities based upon the perceptions we have of the situation or issue.

In other words, we want to try to establish our own reality in that situation and sometimes it means we must alter our own initial reality to get where we want to go or to receive what we want to receive. If you think about your own situations, how do you think different issues correlate to this? It is something we all run into from time to time, but it’s daily, if not hourly, that this situation happens because when you think about it, each time someone enters your space, they are changing your reality to a certain degree and you are changing your reality to a certain degree to adjust to whatever the issue may be.

It is said you should be true to your nature, but we can’t always do that because staying true to your nature means no one impacts you, no one changes the way you see things, so the way you see things is the way it is at that time. Is every reaction you have exactly who you are? Not necessarily. People change us just as much as we change them. What we need to be aware of is how much someone is changing our reality or how much we’re changing our reality for them.

Another example is if you look at business relationships such as boss to employee.  An employee is always trying to be the perfect subordinate even when that is not necessarily their nature or their reality. I’m not saying they should be a bad employee, I’m just saying they are not being themselves. When they are not being themselves and just saying what the boss wants to hear they are creating a perception that may not be reality.  We have to be aware of ourselves and who we are, and, unless we are aware of the nature of the person we are talking to, we can’t help but change some realities.  We have to make the choice of who we are  going to be and the frustration for many comes when they look back and realize, “that was not who I am”.

If we want to be as consistent as possible, we must know who we are and what we want and need to have a philosophy of life that initiates a nature that is easy to project. What that means is, if you have a philosophy of life that says, “seek happiness in everything you do,” then your projection reflects that attitude.

Typically, what you give is what you will receive. If you are consistent in what you project, then what you receive is going to be will be in like manner.  If you are always smiling at people, I would be willing to bet that you are constantly receiving smiles in return.
The bottom line is, know who you are, know what you want, know how to give, know your philosophy of life and understand as much as you can the nature of other people. Joy is found in drawing people into the reality of happiness and contentment.

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The Brilliance of Life

In 1966 I had a profound experience that has remained with me throughout my life. I was fourteen years old at the time and, to my knowledge, I was off to an adventure that would be something different than I had ever known. Different in the fact that I had never been away from home that much and even though this was probably less than thirty miles away, it was still away from home and I was on my own. It was at Camp Sambica (I still remember the name) that we talked about dedicating our life to Christ, and I remember that for a while the thoughts were in one ear and out the other, until we had a campfire and expressed our commitments. Something powerful happened and my reality changed. I don’t know how to explain it; it was just that I knew I was on the right path and I had something to believe in. Although I had been going to church my entire life, all fourteen years of it, it never really impacted me as it did on that particular night.

The reason I bring this up is because our reality is shaped in so many different ways and my commitment at that point took many hits over the years as far as temptations and straying, but the basis for following a carpenter from 2000 years ago has always struck me as being something that was rather odd and why it was that one man would have such an effect.

As the years passed, I realized that the teachings of two things, love and learning, were the core of why I believed and why I followed. I have tried to take those core beliefs and apply them to other religions and find the love and learning there. Doing this has helped me understand the goodness of each one, and in finding that goodness, came tolerance and acceptance. It is interesting to go back and see, in a moment’s flash, the effect of a change of reality and what it can have on an entire life. Many people ask questions about different aspects of faith or religion, “what happens if”, “how can you justify this to that”.  I do not believe that it is my place to justify. My place is to accept what I believe, be true to my reality and try to have a perspective that is open to all. I do try to rationalize the different comments and how they apply to different social constructs and the events that occur within our world that seem to make no sense.

In every area of life there are events or occurrences that make no sense depending upon what your belief structure is or how you view life. If you view life as a struggle and as something that you are put here to simply get through, it is difficult to see the brilliance of life; however, if you look at it as a wondrous thing, for the time we are here, it should be a joy. In every situation, depending upon your faith and beliefs, you have the ability to see the joy or the happy outcome of whatever that situation might be.

We can look at all the world’s events and try to make sense of what is going on, but in the end, it comes down to each individual’s belief and how that impacts the overall global reality. If you have an attitude of love and learning, everything you look at or try to make sense of, you see as a learning experience, and, as in a previous blog, you really see what is going on, what went on, and what precluded the events that are happening.

I know personally that, many times, I wish I could have more of an impact on some of the events that precluded the actual occurrence. For now, I believe it is a matter of understanding who we are, and I allude to this in my workshop, that our purpose boils down to what is important to us. What is important to us isn’t necessarily global such as world peace but maybe is as simple as helping to guide our child to the next level in life and find happiness.  Or, doing what we can to assist our parents in having an old age that is full of contentment. In other words, our purpose in this life can be glorious, global and extravagant, or it can be simple, yet rewarding, depending upon what is important to us.

My advice to all is to find your brilliance in life by seeking the small as well as the large, truly loving, seeing and having an impact.  Your happiness will result in the learning and joy in the experience.

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Thoughts Trigger Perception but Define Reality

We go through life with all sorts of external issues defining who people think we are.  Growing up, I was very introverted but rarely get defined that way today; then, in my twenties I “blossomed” into a “me first” type of person.  It is funny how getting married and having kids can change all that.

I look back now and can’t remember a time when I actually thought about how my thoughts were defining me.  I seemed to be reacting to everything and everyone around me.  Do you ever have to assume a role to make sure people view you the way you want?  Let me explain.  I always want people to see me as a confident, professional and knowledgeable speaker.  The problem is, my thoughts don’t always synch with my action.

What this means to me is that I “assume” I don’t have the confidence, professionalism or knowledge that I want to exude but I know that my actions are going to give the impression  that I do.  So, the question is, since my thoughts are creating an external perception, aren’t they also creating a new reality in me?

Think about your own situation.  Who are you and who are you perceived to be?  Your thoughts can take various roads in defining who you are going to be.  Are you really the life of the party or is that a role you play?   Understand that, if you create this perception, people may assume this is who you are.

All of this comes down to knowing who you are and/or who you want to be.  I prefer to think of myself as reserved, private, kind, understanding, a good listener, etc.  So, when I go into situations that may deviate from those qualities, I have to consciously think about I should stay the course or assume a “role.”

Just understand that your thoughts define you, accurately or not!

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Drop the Assumptions

To perceive a circumstance is to put one’s judgement on whether it exists or does not exist.  In all forms of human experience, this is what constantly defines our view of reality.  With this in mind, we can change our attitude, which in turn, changes our perception of the circumstance.

When we assume that our perception is real, then our reality becomes our attitude.  The risk here is that, one, we are assuming, and, two that it is our perception.  So, we are constantly living in a world of assumptions and perceptions.  Therefore, the question becomes, ‘when do we know it is real?

And, off we go into the realm of Realities and our attitudes based on the realitie